Coping mechanisms  

It was a clear Friday night and not too freezing, which is rare in usually foggy August in San Francisco. The Giants beat the Rockies 5-4. I don't know why it was Fireworks Night at Oracle Park, but thousands of us stayed after the game for the spectacle. The stadium lights were turned off, the DJ amped up the music and we watched gorgeous fireworks in a clear night sky. I sat there, smiling, delighted, feeling as carefree and happy as a child. I had forgotten what celebratory delight with thousands of people felt like. It was delicious, it was miraculous. When BTS's Dynamite played over the biggest bursts of fireworks I felt transcendent, my soul filling with essential nutrients that have been absent for far too long.

Now that the Delta variant has taken over so much of the world and fires and hurricanes and floods are ravaging both sides of the country, I keep trying to reach back to recreate that moment. I am listening to (and watching) BTS non-stop. They're my playlist on my walks, in my car, in my apartment. Their perfect pop sound feels like the only possible conduit to help me find that elusive but absolutely necessary simple joy. I don't know why and I don't care. I'm just embracing what works.

Thank you BTS for doing what you do - thanks for the joy.   

September 7, 2021