The last three posts have not specifically been about communication, they’ve been about what it feels like to be in a leadership position – how people project ‘boss’ onto you and lose sight of who you really are, how the leadership mantle depletes your energy and what to focus on to replenish it, and why being an irreverent iconoclast is career limiting.
If poseycorp is dedicated to helping innovators become great communicators, why are we covering stuff that’s not specifically about communicating? Because how you feel has tremendous impact on what you say and how you say it.
For example, if you walk into your senior staff meeting hoping for encouragement and support, your needs will unconsciously color everything you say. If you are intellectually, physically and emotionally depleted when you walk out on stage, you’ll give a lackluster keynote.
You must become self aware to be a great communicator and leader. Find a trusted advisor to help you identify the unconscious needs, depleted resources, fears and biases you are carrying. Then take action to meet your needs, compensate for your biases and replenish your energy so you’ll have the clarity and patience to be a great communicator.
For example, do you want to stimulate fierce and productive debate among your senior leadership team because that’s the best way to get to the right answers? The less aware leader will dive in with a forceful position and not even notice that everyone in the room shuts down half way through the conversation – because they don’t want to publicly disagree with the CEO.
But you, the self-aware leader, you deliberately create the right conditions for a productive debate. First, you accept that even your most senior staff see you as a ‘boss’. You don’t waste cycles thinking about whether this should be true. It just is. Move on.
In the conference room, before debating the big issue, you announce your intentions. You tell your team that you want an open and intense debate on this important topic, that you value and need all of their input to make the best decision. Having set the stage, you do not speak first. You encourage each person to speak. You call on the people who are not speaking up. As discussion goes on you do not dismiss opinions – either verbally (you do not interrupt or take over the discussion) or non-verbally (no head shaking, eye rolling, looking at your phone or doodling). You actively listen. You consider. Then, when you forcefully argue your position (last or nearly last), you invite people to poke holes in it, to question you. If they don’t, you draw them out – citing the points they made when they spoke.
Yes, this approach takes more time, which is always in short supply. It also takes great patience and discipline from you, which you’ll have as a resourced leader. But if you do this consistently in every critical discussion you will create a culture of debate. Your organization will get the benefit of everyone’s powerful thinking, not just yours. And isn’t that worth any effort?
Communication is the essential last mile in finding and motivating the right teams, acquiring strong allies, powerfully bonding with customers, and capturing mindshare with compelling stories. Nothing will serve you and your vision better than developing exceptional communication skills.
